By daily dying I have come to be !!

Why bad things happen to good people???. This is the question that anguished me when I tried to contemplate why good things happen to bad people..hummmm

I have been experiencing this problem since long time,one that is with me till today.i have a habit of observing the prosperity of the wicked,of the bad people…..May be they are not actully bad for others but for me… they are unregenerated…those who do not have any need of God’s blessings and care,who didn’t acknowledge god and are athiest,who did their own thing,behave as per their pleasure,believeing only in oneself,living for themselves,the ones for whome every other person is either a puppet ,dancing into their tunes or traces of dust….for whome the world is their servant ,playing their own songs and enjoying their own pleasures and wealth……Gosssshhhh

They have been bestowed with all the delicacies of life..free from all the burdens,not being plagued by ills of humans..just as I am experiencing…being bestowed with the exemption from all struggles and strains of daily living…alwyz a cynosure for others eye and enjoying prosperity..huh…where as compared to them..it seems that I am being punished everyday,everymorning…every now and then….

Often I wonder why is it that Its me only who face soo many problems and so much trouble in my life..why is it that I  often cry for being misunderstood for every right thing I doo… and these wicked ones having none…..It is actually becoming my obsession with every passing day..taking my thoughts to a different world,making me think all sort of weird and peculiar things..about my religion,my goodness,my kind nature,my honesty,my looks,my attitude,my self respect ..every little thing..

Is it that I am being tempted by the evil and prosperity of those wicked and probabbly that’s he reason what is making me vulnerable towards the wicked league..hussshhhhhhh…..or is it the envy that I have in mind for others ,..its making me so unclean that I am being restless day by day..

May be I am trying to run away from truth,I dunt know but I really cannot understand what is happeing to me..or may be the experiences in front of me are actually the lessons that life is wanting to teach me…in order to give me strength to differenciate between right and wrong ,so that it protects me from falling .

Being envious of the prosperity of the wicked is not the way out as prosperity is just an image ,a fashion show of what is to pass away just like a plesant dream ,that pleases us only for a little while when we are asleep,but when we are awake we discover ,it was not real….may be I am being senseless and ignorant by envying the wicked who are actully born to perish………..